Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Never Send a Cat To Do a Plants Job...

Sal Esposito, crime drama fan, Boston resident, and full-blooded, short-haired domestic feline has been summoned to court for jury duty. Unlike justice, this juror sleeps often. Mostly during daylight hours. Tell me there is nothing wrong with a system that summons a pet for jury duty. Tell me that, further, once the owners of the pet write a letter explaining the pet has no ability to understand English, and thus testimony, plus includes a letter notarized by their vet that there is still nothing wrong with the judicial system in our country. Now I am all for animal rights. In our house, they are people, too. In fact, our boy cat often neglects to give me the first sip of a bottled brew that I have just opened. Who can blame him, though? His name is barley and he was born on St. Patrick's Day. Aside from that, though, I would be loathe to give him a voice in a criminal trial. His genius is better demonstrated in house with situations such as 'who just came in the front door?' and 'I know that isn't a real mouse because you throw it at me every night and then it just lays there but damn, this thing is exciting!'.
I am rather a big fan of the city of Boston, but I must confess, were I to move there, I would have to seriously consider putting my pets down as residents. Apparently, there aren't enough folks there to staff their burgeoning civil caseload. Who would have thought, considering they are in the top 3 of United States' capitol cities' populations. I suppose it's a good thing the Esposito's do not live in Vermont--their cat could potentially have been nominated as a state representative.

This has been brought to you under the influence of Sweetwaters' Happy Ending and extreme exhaustion.

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